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x - 0021 [Memento Mori]
Jan. 23rd, 2009 05:17 pm[ Private; Hackable with effort ]
I have chased truth to the exclusion of all else; risked and sacrificed everything I held dear. My career, my life; those I loved; all casualties in the pursuit of some inexplicable explanation, a tangled web whose ephemeral strands I've sought to grasp without thought to the cost or the consequence.
And now I find myself the agent of secrecy, the architect of my own small conspiracy; not because I know the end is coming, but because I know it is not. I have seen the end of the dark passageway my partner is walking; have been blinded by the light of day that lies beyond. I've lived the days she doesn't dare to hope for, in these moments when her faith in science rallies its forces against her faith in herself, her belief in God.
Is it possible-- is it wise-- to bridge the years between us, the distance I attributed to shock? Would it drive her away, to know how close we have yet to come? Or will it do more harm to keep these things from her; a future she cannot fight, waiting upon her return to the real world.
I can't keep this secret... But I don't know how to share this truth.
[ /Private ]
[ Filtered Away from Scully ]
So. Question of the evening-- who comes from a world where they've figured out to cure cancer? Better yet, who can do it themselves?
Yes, there is a certain amount of urgency involved here.
[ /Filtered ]
I have chased truth to the exclusion of all else; risked and sacrificed everything I held dear. My career, my life; those I loved; all casualties in the pursuit of some inexplicable explanation, a tangled web whose ephemeral strands I've sought to grasp without thought to the cost or the consequence.
And now I find myself the agent of secrecy, the architect of my own small conspiracy; not because I know the end is coming, but because I know it is not. I have seen the end of the dark passageway my partner is walking; have been blinded by the light of day that lies beyond. I've lived the days she doesn't dare to hope for, in these moments when her faith in science rallies its forces against her faith in herself, her belief in God.
Is it possible-- is it wise-- to bridge the years between us, the distance I attributed to shock? Would it drive her away, to know how close we have yet to come? Or will it do more harm to keep these things from her; a future she cannot fight, waiting upon her return to the real world.
I can't keep this secret... But I don't know how to share this truth.
[ /Private ]
[ Filtered Away from Scully ]
So. Question of the evening-- who comes from a world where they've figured out to cure cancer? Better yet, who can do it themselves?
Yes, there is a certain amount of urgency involved here.
[ /Filtered ]
