x - 0001 [Nothing Important Happened Today]

[call_me_spooky]

[Voice]

[Almost inaudibly]

Shit.

[Long pause.]

O-kaaay… Not in Kansas anymore. Look, if I’m dead, Clyde Bruckman? You owe me an apology.

So, working on the assumption that I’m not… Is anyone out there?

I could use a hand here.

Comments

Donna Noble: a new kind of laxative

[tempzilla.livejournal.com]

Oh, you're one of those "method actors"? Like Marlon Brando? Are you shooting another movie? Where's Gillian? I've gotta tell you, I wasn't really impressed with I Want to Believe. It just didn't feel like a REAL X-Files story, you know? And that beard! Ugh! BAD idea! I hope you have a new hair and make-up artist. Hey, maybe I could do it!


....I'm sorry, am I babbling?

[call_me_spooky]

Beard? What? Who the hell is Gillian? I--

...Yes, you're babbling, and you're not making much sense. Okay. I think I've got it.

My name is Fox Mulder.

I'm Fox Mulder.

I'm seriously not someone other than Fox Mulder.

Okay?

A beard, seriously? Do I even want to know?

[tempzilla.livejournal.com]

...oookay. Listen, there's method acting, and then there's crazy.

[call_me_spooky]

I'm not crazy. I'm just probably from a different reality than you. I think. My name is Mulder, I don't know who David Whatever is, and despite all claims to the contrary I'm completely sane.

...

A beard? Really? That doesn't sound like me. I wanna talk to the writers. I will take your advice under consideration but I wasn't planning to grow one anyway.

[tempzilla.livejournal.com]

Riiiight. Because t.v. shows aren't fiction; they're just glimpses into alternate realities! You should talk to John -- I bet you two'd have a grand old time.

[call_me_spooky]

In this case? That seems to be about right. Who's John?

Also, I don't think I caught your name?

[tempzilla.livejournal.com]

John Smith. World's most boring name, right? I think he's some sort of doctor... I've heard people call him "The Doctor," like he's the only one to ever have excited. Really nice bloke, if a bit maddening at times. Claims he used to be a "time traveler." Just saying the words gives me a headache...

Donna Noble! It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Duchovney. Er. Mulder.

[call_me_spooky]

World's most fake name, usually. But hey, some people like naming their kids strange things.

You don't believe in time travel?

It's a pleasure, Donna.

[tempzilla.livejournal.com]

God, don't you start too. It's just. Not. Possible. And that's all I'm gonna say about it although I'll get another bloody migraine.

[call_me_spooky]

I've done it, though. I was in 1939.

[tempzilla.livejournal.com]

Riight. Of course. Yep. Definitely bonkers.